Let me start off by saying that I realize the World Wide Web is a magnificent conduit for commerce. BUT: Junk e-mail IS NOT a positive manifestation of said conduit.
Therefore I DO NOT WISH TO RECEIVE ANY JUNK E-MAIL! I don't want to buy any product or service that is advertised through junk e-mail.
E-mail is, however, welcome if it's from someone commenting on this site, somebody who just wants to say "hi," someone with a cool site they want to have me include in the Angry Links, media companies letting me know about materials for review or if it's from a prospective advertiser wishing to learn how they can use Angry Viking Productions to promote their product (hey, this is a popular site, I don't mind exploiting myself one bit). If your correspondence fits this criteria then I'm always more than willing to entertain electronic social intercourse.
HOWEVER, any electronic mail received advertising goods or services for purchase will be treated as a request for reviewing and proofreading. In other words, I will assume that the proofing services of Angry Viking Productions have been requested and that the solicitor agrees to the charges described in the fee schedule below.
Proofreading and reviewing charges:
|Initial download of e-mail solicitation||$5|
|Proofreading and first mark-up||$10|
|Spell-checking per 100 words, 100-word minimum||$100|
|Content Review per page, one page minimum||$100|
|Reviewer's Report and proofed copy with proofing comments||$50|
|Telephone consultation (if phone number provided, but no mailing address)||$10|
|Shipping and handling charges for proofing report submission (sent registered mail)||$15|
I've decided to pay any sales tax myself, due to complaints... That is, the minimum cost for proofing an unsolicited junk e-mail is $290. All bills are due within 30 days of receipt of proofing report.
THUS, now that everyone understands my Angry E-mail Policy, I look forward to your Angry E-mail!
|David Lee Beowulf|
CEO, COO, and President
Angry Viking Productions